Messing Up

A few nights ago, I was packing up my guitar to take to my room to practice for a half-hour between two production shows. Our trumpet player stopped me and said it was fine to leave my guitar on the bandstand between shows. I said that I knew, but I wanted to go over some stuff. I told him frustratedly that I kept messing up the same parts in the show, (only I didn't use the word "messing.") He said to me, "Hey man, we're getting paid to mess up," (only he didn't use the word "mess.")

I had a realization after that about my job here as a cruise ship musician. If I lose this gig, it won't be because of my playing. I did well enough in my audition to get in the band, and my playing is good enough. I'm sure I'm not the best guitar player to work for cruise ships, but I'm also not the worst. The rest of the guys in the group are in similar positions. Beyond that, we are all working for a giant faceless corporation with kind of lame taste in music. Since our boss is a giant corporate blob, we don't have to please anybody in particular and it takes a little pressure off.

I have realized that I can pretty much get what I want out of this gig. If I want to practice long hours and get everything right note for note, I can. If I want to just wing it, I can. It's pretty much my choice. I guess it's always like that to some degree though. Anyway, happy Passover and don't forget to celebrate your liberation.